Edited my templates with the design that I like.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Three Things
Three things to be - pure, just and honest
Three things to govern - temper tongue and conduct
Three things to have - courage, affection and gentleness
Three things to love - the wise, the virtuous and the innocent
Three things to commend - thrift, industry and promptness
Three things to despise - cruelty, arrogance and ingratitude
Three things to attain - goodness of heart, integrity, and cheerfulness
Q & A
A. A table!
Q. Why did the turtle cross the road?
A. To get to the Shell station!
Q. What did the ground say to the earthquake?
A. You crack me up!
Q. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and quackers!
Q. Why did the elephant eat the candle?
A. He wanted a light snack!
Q. Why is the letter "G" scary?
A. It turns a host into a ghost
Q. What has 4 eyes but no face?
A. Mississippi!
Q. What did the spider do on the computer?
A. Made a website!
Q. What letters are not in the alphabet?
A. The ones in the mail, of course!
Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A. Because 789!
Q. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
A. Because it felt crummy.
Q. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A. Because you never see rabbits wearing glasses!
Q. What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
A. A little horse
Q. What do you call cheese that is not yours?
A. Nacho Cheese
Q. Why did the sheep say "moo"?
A. It was learning a new language!
Q. What streets do ghosts haunt?
A. Dead ends!
Q. What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer?
A. The Space bar!
Q. What exam do young witches have to pass? A.
A spell-ing test!
Q. Why did the boy eat his homework?
A. Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
Q. Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
A. Because you dribble on the floor!
Q. What is the best day to go to the beach?
A. Sunday, of course!
Q. What bow can't be tied?
A. A rainbow!
Q. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?
A. Every morning you'll rise and shine!
Q. What does a teddy bear put in his house?
A. Fur-niture!
Q.What season is it when you are on a trampoline?
A.Spring time.
Q. What happens to cows during an earthquake?
A. They give milk shakes!
Q. Why did the jelly wobble?
A. Because it saw the milk shake!
Q. What do you call a girl who is always in the bookies?
A. Betty!
Q. Where do cows go on holiday?
A. Moo York
Q. Where did the computer go to dance?
A. To a disc-o.
Q. What do you call a man who rolls in the leaves?
A. Russel
Q. What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A. A Bed
Q. Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A. He was a chicken.
Q. What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
A. The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says "chew chew chew".
Q. Why did the birdie go to the hospital?
A. To get a tweetment.
Q. What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa?
A. A Clausterphobic
Q. Why was the guy looking for the food on his friend?
A. Because his friend said its on me.
Q. Did you hear the joke about the roof?
A. Never mind, it's over your head!
Q. What do you call a cow eating grass in a paddock?
A. A lawn mooer
Q. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A. Because he had no-body to go with.
Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A. He wanted cold hard cash!
Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
A. "Is that you mommy?"
Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.
Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?
A. They take the psycho path.
Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?
A. Cell phones.
Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll
Q. What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?
A. ME!!!
Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?
A. In snow banks.
Q. What's brown and sticky?
A. A stick.
Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch dog
Q. Why did the tomato turn red?
A. It saw the salad dressing!
Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A. It let out a little wine!
Q. How do you make a tissue dance?
A. Put a little boogey in it!
Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?
A. At the BP station!
Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?
A. Odor in the court.
Q. What did the water say to the boat?
A. Nothing, it just waved.
Q. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
A. Dam!
Q. Why don't skeletons fight each other?
A. They don't have the guts
.---.
/ : "" .;;;;;, A lady about seven months pregnant
:` .. (((((((\\ got on a bus. She noticed the man
C` _\ ..`\\)\\) opposite her was smiling at her. She
\ ,_ /_ ))))) immediately moved to another seat.
) / \_= ((((( This time the smile turned into a
/`\\ \(`)))) grin, so she moved again. The man
Y //`\((( seemed more amused. When on the
. / ))) fourth move, the man burst out
. \ (( laughing, she complained to the
. / \ driver and had the man arrested.
: =: / _\
_, _ \ The case came up in court. The
\)))/ \ ((( judge asked the man what he had to
`\ say for himself. The man replied,
___ "Well, your Honor, it was like
this. When the lady got on the bus,
I couldn't help but notice her
condition. She sat under under a
___ /~)) sign that said, "The Double Mint
(____)) /_/YY Twins are Coming" and I had to
smile. Then she moved and sat under
a sign that said,"Slogan' s Liniment will reduce the swelling" and
I had to grin. Then she placed herself under a sign that said,
"William's Big Stick Did the Trick" and I could hardly contain
myself. BUT .....when she moved the fourth time and sat under
a sign that said, "Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this
Accident" I laughed out loud."
"Case Dismissed," said the judge.
Monday, October 09, 2006
About Mr U.S.A's I.Q Level
The Presidential IQ Report
WASHINGTON --
In a published report, the Lovenstein Institute of Scranton, Pennsylvania has detailed findings of a four month study of the intelligence quotient of President George W. Bush. Since 1973, the Lovenstein Institute has published its research to the education community on each new president, which includes the famous "IQ" report among others.
Reports are distributed to subscribing member universities and organizations within the education community.
According to statements in the report, there have been twelve presidents over the past 60 years, from F. D. Roosevelt to G. W. Bush who were all rated based on scholarly achievements, writings that they alone produced without aid of staff, their ability to speak with clarity, and several other psychological factors which were then scored in the Swanson/Crain system of intelligence ranking.
The study determined the following IQs of each president as accurate to within five percentage points:
147 Franklin D. Roosevelt (D)
132 Harry Truman (D)
122 Dwight D. Eisenhower (R)
174 John F. Kennedy (D)
126 Lyndon B. Johnson (D)
155 Rich ard M. Nixon (R)
121 Gerald R. Ford (R)
176 James E. Carter (D)
105 Ronald W. Reagan (R)
98 George H. W. Bush (R)
182 William J. Clinton (D)
91 George W. Bush (R)
The six Republican presidents of the past 60 years had an average IQ of 115.5, with President Nixon having the highest IQ, at 155. President G. W. Bush was rated the lowest of all the Republicans with an IQ of 91.
The six Democrat presidents had IQs with an average of 156, with President Clinton having the highest IQ, at 182. President Lyndon B. Johnson was rated the lowest of all the Democrats with an IQ of 126.
No president other than Carter (D) has released his actual IQ, 176. Among comments made concerning the specific testing of President GW Bush, his low ratings were due to his apparent difficulty to command the English language in public statements, his limited use of vocabulary (6,500 words for Bush versus an average of 11,000 words for other presidents), his lack of scholarly achievements other than a basic MBA, and an absence of any body of work which could be studied on an intellectual basis.
The complete report documents the methods and procedures used to arrive at these ratings, including depth of sentence structure and voice stress confidence analysis. "All the Presidents prior to George W. Bush had a least one book under their belt, and most had written several white papers during their education or early careers.
Not so with President Bush," Dr. Lovenstein said. "He has no published works or writings, so in many ways that made it more difficult to arrive at an assessment. We had to rely more heavily on transcripts of his unscripted public speaking."
"The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden." "It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him." -- George W. Bush 9-13-2001
"I don't know where he (bin Laden) is. I have no idea and I really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority." -- George W. Bush 3-13-2002
http://www.lovenstein.org/report/
The Lovenstein Institute of Scranton Pennsylvania think tank includes high caliber historians, psychiatrists, sociologists, scientists in human behavior, and psychologists. Among their ranks are Dr. Werner R. Lovenstein, world-renowned sociologist, and Professor Patricia F. Dilliams, a world-respected psychiatrist. This study was commissioned on February 13, 2001, and released on July 9, 2001, to subscribing member universities and organizations within the education community.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Poll - Favor Bush Impeachment
Drudge Retort:
In a poll conducted by CNN, 30% said President Bush should be impeached or removed from office upon a Democratic takeover of Congress.
http://www.drudge.com/news/85302/poll-30-favor-bush-impeachment
WASHINGTON --
In a published report, the Lovenstein Institute of Scranton, Pennsylvania has detailed findings of a four month study of the intelligence quotient of President George W. Bush. Since 1973, the Lovenstein Institute has published its research to the education community on each new president, which includes the famous "IQ" report among others.
Reports are distributed to subscribing member universities and organizations within the education community.
According to statements in the report, there have been twelve presidents over the past 60 years, from F. D. Roosevelt to G. W. Bush who were all rated based on scholarly achievements, writings that they alone produced without aid of staff, their ability to speak with clarity, and several other psychological factors which were then scored in the Swanson/Crain system of intelligence ranking.
The study determined the following IQs of each president as accurate to within five percentage points:
147 Franklin D. Roosevelt (D)
132 Harry Truman (D)
122 Dwight D. Eisenhower (R)
174 John F. Kennedy (D)
126 Lyndon B. Johnson (D)
155 Rich ard M. Nixon (R)
121 Gerald R. Ford (R)
176 James E. Carter (D)
105 Ronald W. Reagan (R)
98 George H. W. Bush (R)
182 William J. Clinton (D)
91 George W. Bush (R)
The six Republican presidents of the past 60 years had an average IQ of 115.5, with President Nixon having the highest IQ, at 155. President G. W. Bush was rated the lowest of all the Republicans with an IQ of 91.
The six Democrat presidents had IQs with an average of 156, with President Clinton having the highest IQ, at 182. President Lyndon B. Johnson was rated the lowest of all the Democrats with an IQ of 126.
No president other than Carter (D) has released his actual IQ, 176. Among comments made concerning the specific testing of President GW Bush, his low ratings were due to his apparent difficulty to command the English language in public statements, his limited use of vocabulary (6,500 words for Bush versus an average of 11,000 words for other presidents), his lack of scholarly achievements other than a basic MBA, and an absence of any body of work which could be studied on an intellectual basis.
The complete report documents the methods and procedures used to arrive at these ratings, including depth of sentence structure and voice stress confidence analysis. "All the Presidents prior to George W. Bush had a least one book under their belt, and most had written several white papers during their education or early careers.
Not so with President Bush," Dr. Lovenstein said. "He has no published works or writings, so in many ways that made it more difficult to arrive at an assessment. We had to rely more heavily on transcripts of his unscripted public speaking."
"The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden." "It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him." -- George W. Bush 9-13-2001
"I don't know where he (bin Laden) is. I have no idea and I really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority." -- George W. Bush 3-13-2002
http://www.lovenstein.org/report/
The Lovenstein Institute of Scranton Pennsylvania think tank includes high caliber historians, psychiatrists, sociologists, scientists in human behavior, and psychologists. Among their ranks are Dr. Werner R. Lovenstein, world-renowned sociologist, and Professor Patricia F. Dilliams, a world-respected psychiatrist. This study was commissioned on February 13, 2001, and released on July 9, 2001, to subscribing member universities and organizations within the education community.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Poll - Favor Bush Impeachment
Drudge Retort:
In a poll conducted by CNN, 30% said President Bush should be impeached or removed from office upon a Democratic takeover of Congress.
http://www.drudge.com/news/85302/poll-30-favor-bush-impeachment
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
July About Football-FIFA Worl Cup 2006 Prediction Too
This one I got from one of our daily newpapers. Happenned in Germany during SWR1 a radio station broadcaster. They talked about this, Germany won the World Cup in 1954 and 1974. Multiply these two (54x74) numbers together and you come up with 3996.
The last World Cup that Germany won was 1990. Subtract 1990 from 3996 and get this the number is 2006. So this year is 2006.
According to them mathematically Germany will win. Really???
The last World Cup that Germany won was 1990. Subtract 1990 from 3996 and get this the number is 2006. So this year is 2006.
According to them mathematically Germany will win. Really???
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Amusings this February-World War On Terror
A Joke : Letter From Osama to Bush
After numerous rounds of "We don't know if Osama is still alive",
Osama himself decided to send George Bush a letter in his own hand writing to let him know he is still alive and in the game.
Bush opened the letter as it appeared to contain a single line of coded message:
370HSSV-0773H
Bush was baffled, so he mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. No one could solve it at the FBI.
So it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain's MI-6 for help.
Within a minute MI-6 cabled the White House with this reply:
"Tell the President he's holding the message upside down." "HELLO-ASSHOLE"
Saturday, January 28, 2006
About The Chinese New Year 2006 and Their Bitches
It's another holiday here, The Chinese New Year for 2006. The whole country is off for the holidays because the chinese is the second largest community here, number one would be the Malays.
It's the year of the dog for them..the chinese. And when there are dogs there are sure to be lots of BITCHES!
So it it seems appropriate that I post this photo to remind us all about those damn BITCHES!
It's the year of the dog for them..the chinese. And when there are dogs there are sure to be lots of BITCHES!
So it it seems appropriate that I post this photo to remind us all about those damn BITCHES!
Who let the dogs out!
Learn to speak Chinese
Are you harboring a fugitive- Hu Yu Hai Ding
See me A.S.A.P. - Kum Hia Nao
Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni
Your price is too high - No Bai Dam Thing
Did you go to the beach - Wai Yu So Tan
I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni
I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat
It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?
Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?
That was an unauthorized execution.- Lin Ching
I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?
This is a tow away zone. - No Pah King
You are not very bright - Yu So Dum
I got this for free - Ai No Pei
I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?
Please, stay a while longer - Wai Go Nao?
Our meeting was scheduled for next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao
They have arrived - Hia Dei Kum
Stay out of sight - Lei Lo
He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka
Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?
Monday, January 23, 2006
About my Personality
Mo, your Personality Summary
Key Areas of your Personality
Your personality stands out from the average person's particularly in the areas of:
- Your High Curiosity Level
- Your Low Emotional Reactivity Level
- Your High Need for Variety
- Your High Assertiveness Level
One chapter of your 100-page Personality Report is dedicated to how you compare to the average woman and the average man in the 8 main areas of personality, and how this affects the way that people interact with you.
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Subset of your Personality Measurement:
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| Social Need | |
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| Openness | |
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| Approval Need | |
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| Ability to Focus | |
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| Reliance on Intuition | |
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| Tolerance for Change | |
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Your personality is made up of a unique pattern of traits. These traits impact the way you think, feel, and behave on an everyday basis. In your report you will read a detailed explanation of each of your core personality traits, including your strengths and challenge points.
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Your Interaction Style:
You scored 35 in the area of extroversion/ introversion, which means that your energy is directed primarily inward, rather than outward. Your mixed score in this trait creates an interesting and alluring combination of traits: You are social yet also very reflective and introspective. You like to be around people, but too much interaction drains your energy. You need to retreat every once in a while in order to recharge your batteries. Keep these needs in mind when choosing the ideal work situation for you, otherwise you won't feel happy.
Social patterns: You are right-brained when it comes to interacting with people and recognizing emotions in other people. When you look at a person's face you focus on what you see on the left. Hearing preferences are an interesting exception to this right-left crossover. For example, if two people were talking behind a closed door and you needed to put your ear on the door to hear, you would tend to use your right ear instead of your left.
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